Should You Support Your Family Forever?

Samuel Chua

23rd October 2025 - 5 min read

A proposal to make it legally mandatory for adult children to financially support their ageing parents has reignited debate about family responsibility and the realities of modern life in Malaysia.

Deputy Minister in the Prime Minister’s Department (Law and Institutional Reform) M. Kulasegaran recently said that the government is studying the possibility of such a law, following complaints from senior citizens who feel abandoned by their children.

While the idea may sound fair in principle, experts warn that legislating family care could deepen conflict at home and fail to address the real problem, which is the lack of financial preparedness among both parents and their adult children.

Why The Issue Matters

Malaysia’s population is ageing rapidly. The Department of Statistics projects that by 2048, 14% of Malaysians will be aged 65 and above, officially classifying the country as an aged nation. Yet many retirees still rely heavily on their children for day-to-day expenses and medical costs.

Meanwhile, many in their 30s and 40s face their own financial pressures, such as raising children, managing housing loans, and coping with rising living costs. This has created what sociologists call the “sandwiched generation”, people caught between caring for ageing parents and supporting their own families.

Our latest RinggitPlus Malaysian Financial Literacy Survey 2025 (RMFLS 2025) found that many middle-income earners are under increasing financial pressure, with 47% living paycheck to paycheck and 54% feeling anxious or frustrated about their finances. Among Malaysians earning between RM5,000 and RM10,000 a month, savings power has fallen, with nearly four in ten now saving less than RM500 monthly.

For many, the question is no longer whether they should support their parents, but how to do so without jeopardising their own financial stability. This is where early financial planning becomes essential.

The Case For Planning Ahead

Family support should ideally begin with long-term planning rather than as a reaction to financial strain. Establishing a family financial plan that considers the needs of parents and children can help prevent future hardship and reduce tension later in life.

Planning early for retirement is one of the most effective steps. Setting aside a portion of income into the Employees Provident Fund (EPF), private retirement schemes, or long-term savings plans allows individuals to build financial independence for the future.

Insurance can also play a significant role in reducing pressure on children. Adequate medical, life, and eldercare coverage can help families manage unexpected costs without dipping into personal savings.

It’s equally important to plan together. Families that regularly discuss finances, caregiving arrangements, and medical preferences are often better prepared to handle challenges when they arise. These conversations can help align expectations and prevent misunderstandings, especially among siblings.

Caring for ageing parents should be a collective effort. When family members coordinate decisions and share responsibilities, it helps ensure that no one person bears the full emotional or financial load.

Such planning does not eliminate strain completely, but it provides structure and stability. When both generations understand their roles and resources, family support becomes more sustainable and less stressful.

What Experts Say About The Proposed Law

Universiti Malaya sociologist and anthropologist Associate Professor Dr Haslina Muhamad said that introducing a law could act as a symbolic reminder of the duty to care for parents, but its effectiveness may be limited.

“The law would essentially send a message that ‘you should do this’. It may raise awareness, but it seldom leads to genuine adoption of the value,” she said.

Haslina noted that the degree of family conflict often depends on income levels, the number of siblings, and whether the family lives in an urban or rural area.

“Strict court enforcement might ensure compliance, but it could also damage relationships. If introduced, the law should focus on mediation and reconciliation rather than punitive measures,” she added.

Beyond Law: Building Supportive Systems

Haslina also stressed that any legal approach should be complemented by broader social and financial measures.

These include affordable eldercare options, flexible leave arrangements for caregivers, and better community-based support systems.

RMFLS 2025 also highlights that 43% of Malaysians are not covered by medical insurance, while 15% rely only on company-issued medical cards. Rising premiums have also forced about 22% of policyholders to reduce or cancel coverage, signalling the need for more accessible and affordable protection options.

Expanding financial literacy programmes at both school and workplace levels could also help Malaysians plan for multi-generational needs earlier in life. Understanding how to balance personal, parental, and retirement goals can improve long-term resilience and reduce future dependency.

Another practical step is to develop community-based eldercare models such as shared living facilities or cooperative care centres, which can help families manage costs and access reliable support. These initiatives can ease the burden on individuals while ensuring older adults receive consistent care.

International Islamic University Malaysia Assistant Professor of Sociology Dr Fatimah Alzahrah Syed Hussien Al-Attas added that stronger retirement schemes and structured withdrawals from EPF or pension funds could help reduce dependency.

She also proposed social insurance for the elderly, where adult children can contribute towards their parents’ retirement before leaving the workforce.

“Returning the responsibility of care to children must take into account the realities of modern work-life balance and financial pressure. Otherwise, we risk worsening stress and fertility decline,” she said.

Finding A Sustainable Balance

While caring for one’s parents remains a core value in Malaysian culture, the financial landscape has changed. Dual-income households, rising healthcare costs, and longer life expectancies have made caregiving more complex.

Experts agree that the solution lies not only in laws or moral reminders, but in financial readiness and open family dialogue. Parents and children must plan together by saving, insuring, and communicating early to ensure that support for ageing parents is sustainable, not compulsory.

5 1 vote

Article Rating